Though our adoption process officially took 982 days, it was decades in the making. As 10 or 11-year-olds, Kenny and I each decided that adoption was the path for our futures. Though we wouldn’t meet for another 15 years, the moment we had the “adoption talk” was the moment I knew we’d get married.
Fast forward to National Adoption Month in 2021. Just two weeks after we’d moved into our house in Colorado, we found ourselves finally filling out the initial application with CCAI. We had every intention of joining the China program– I spoke Mandarin and had lived in rural China for a year, so it gave us the best shot at preserving our child’s language and culture.
About halfway through our home study in January 2022, we had a gut feeling that something needed to change. After a tear-filled night and little sleep, we emailed and asked to speak to Kimberly about the Taiwan program. It was a daunting switch as the Taiwan program has a much different process than China did, but looking back, it was the greatest decision we’ve ever made.
The Taiwan program process is much different than the China program, and after 14 incredibly challenging months, we received an email from Kimberly with a picture of the cutest 4-year-old girl we’d ever seen. We got right to work on the lengthy match application and spent the next few months crossing our fingers and toes.
Then, on June 21, 2023, we received another email from Kimberly that said, “Might we be able to chat today? I have news.” I rushed to meet Kenny in his work parking lot, and we heard the words that would change our lives forever, “Cathwel has chosen you to parent. Her name is Mei-Ling.”
It was nearly a year of hurry up and wait, completing our home study paperwork and dossier, and filing seemingly endless paperwork with USCIS. The monthly Skypes and updates from Cathwel kept us going– I will never forget the first time we heard Mei-Ling call us Mama and Baba while we ate mooncakes together on our first call. Outside of those moments, it felt like we were never going to make it to the end of this crazy process.
On April Fool’s Day, we received an email that felt like a trick– we actually had court dates and would be traveling to Taiwan to finally meet Mei-Ling! Exactly one month later (to the hour!), we were on a plane to Taipei.
When we first met Mei-Ling, we were all a little shy and unsure, but within an hour, we were playing and giggling together, and I couldn’t imagine a world where we didn’t find each other.
The next day, the three of us, along with Franky, the government social worker, and the translator, headed to the court building, where I was repeatedly told the advice I had first heard a few weeks earlier, “Cassie, it is incredibly important that you speak to the judge in Mandarin.” I was terrified and overwhelmed– we had the incredible opportunity to speak directly to the judge about how important it was that she come home ASAP, and the weight of that moment was not lost on me.
We walked into the courtroom and sat around an oval desk, and after the other members of our team spoke to the judge, we were asked to share why we were prepared to adopt Mei-Ling. We spoke of our experience as an ESL Teacher and a Pharmacist, our backgrounds working with people who have experienced trauma, and how we had specifically prepared for Mei-Ling. At least…that’s what I think we talked about. The second I started talking about how long we had been working toward this, I started sobbing and couldn’t stop. Our sweet little girl, who had been a total Baba’s girl up to this point, gave me her stuffed bunny and rubbed my leg, and the government social worker later told me, “crying was a good look.”
A day later, we were on a plane back to the U.S. with no real idea of when we would see our sweet little girl again.
Throughout the entire adoption process, we had been doing what seemingly every family in the Taiwan program does– constantly, furiously comparing dates. That meant we were absolutely shocked when we had pickup dates on the calendar just 3 weeks after court. We would later learn that the judge had issued our first ruling the day after our court date– a completely unheard-of bit of luck.
On June 30, we flew back to Taiwan, and on July 5, we were a family forever.
We soaked up our time together in Taiwan, and our little animal lover made sure we met every dog in the greater Taipei area. On July 11, we flew back to the U.S., and after a year of waiting, she finally got to meet her four-legged best friend.
Within hours of landing, we were playing in the backyard, splashing in her kiddie pool while tears streamed down my face. I couldn’t believe that she was really here, really home. It seemed impossible, but what everyone had told me was true– once you’re home, it’ll all be a blur.
The past few months home have been full of learning about each other and adjusting to life together, but also SO much joy. It seems like each and every week we say, “Wow, this week she made so much progress!” and every week it’s true. Seeing her grow into her bubbly, confident, hilarious, extroverted, musical, animal-loving self has been nothing short of magical. I find myself wondering all the time how this crazy, demanding, excruciating process ended with us bringing home the sweetest, most incredible girl!
